So many things can be the cause- chemical imbalance, life events, other people. Especially blogging- the more publicity you snag, the more you attract the internet trolls- unfortunately. There are people lurking, just wasting time, waiting to ruin someones day. It can get to me often, when I see friends of mine suffering from this- I can't understand how anyone could be cruel and thoughtless enough to drop a comment on some forum in cyber space that starts a crazy, wacked out trail of internet bullies.
Then there's "real life" as it could be called. A lot of times, I think the life events that take place day to day are like the wood for the fire, and the internet realm sets it a flame. Why? Because we all have base insecurities, every single one of us. All it takes is for someone to hit a cord that will bring out all of those nasty hurts we've worked so hard to brush aside and move on from.
But besides those little things, there are always underlying causes for sadness- something that lurks in our minds and gives us that melancholy facet to our thought life.
The thing about sadness and depression is that it will nag you incessantly, until it fills every thought, every action, every word. And it feeds off of each day that passes- like Chinese water torture. The more you think about the things that scar you, the more the dripping water drives you to a state of madness.
Which is why a choice must be made. Struggling with sadness or depression is like wearing handcuffs, and having the key to unlock them sitting right in front of you. But you make no move for them. Because sometimes letting go of the memories and things that ail you can seem more painful than remembering. It's gathering the courage to reach for that key and release yourself from whatever it is that holds you back.
The thing is that our minds will grasp at anything we can to hold onto those hurts- even though we don't want to suffer the pain anymore, it just takes too much strength for a human being to let go on their own.
Mathew 11:28 says, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."
Sometimes we will reach a point where, at long last, we realize we don't want to feel this way anymore. The times when I've experienced this, I've had to sit back, say a farewell to those feelings and memories that have held me captive, and pray to God that he will remove them from me. While a part of me aches for the thought I letting it all go, I realize that I will be all the better for giving it up to God, and leaving my bundle ( as in Pilgrim's Progress) at the foot of the cross. When we let go, God is faithful to heal us. It's not to say that old wounds won't be re-opened from time to time- it's a journey, a breath by breath process. But it's 100% easier when we know that God is there beside us. It's a much less lonely notion that muddling through it by yourself- and trusting that He will be faithful to work it all out is momentous! What an incredible relief it is to trust that we will one day be able to look back and see how it all makes sense.
"Cast all your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; He will never let the righteous be shaken."
Psalm 55:22
